


chronic, hectic.

by minute0fdecay



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Barebacking, Explicit Sexual Content, Fake AH Crew, Graphic Description, Homophobia, M/M, Murder, Rough Sex, Slurs, sort of, very light Dom/sub
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-23
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-03-02 23:07:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2829326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minute0fdecay/pseuds/minute0fdecay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is absolutely inspired by the episode of Criminal Minds - "The Thirteenth Step" (6x13) - an absolutely awesome episode of possibly my favourite TV show. </p><p>***</p><p>Ryan and Geoff are a mostly ordinary newly-wed couple. Sort of. They have odd interests that they share, they don’t have homes, but they do have extensive criminal records and they are experts in avoiding law enforcement. Both have extremely volatile tempers, but never towards each other and in the right situations are killing machines, but apart from that, they’re perfectly normal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	chronic, hectic.

**Author's Note:**

> Homophobia, slurs and kinda vulgar language up ahead! Hints of dom/sub and lots of violence. There are your warnings! But apart from that enjoy my CM inspired Ramwood (this is for you enthusiastic commenter <3)

Ryan and Geoff are a mostly ordinary newly-wed couple. Sort of. They have odd interests that they share, they don’t have homes, but they do have extensive criminal records and they _are_ experts in avoiding law enforcement. Both have extremely volatile tempers, but never towards each other and in the right situations are killing machines, but apart from that, they’re perfectly normal.

Ryan swigs from a bottle of whiskey and hands the bottle to Geoff, who always drinks whiskey while driving around in their stolen convertible. He’s never been caught and doesn’t intend to get caught either. He’s done worse things than driving drunk.

The Los Santos air is cool on Ryan’s face as they speed through the dark roads, looking for a perfect place for their honeymoon. Despite their lack of houses, they have money and lots of it and need it as they live most of their lives on the road avoiding the cops. And alongside a trunk with all of their possessions, that’s all they need. They live in motels, no more than a week in one place, and it’s perfect.

“Dude. Can’t get married without champagne. Pull over at the next place.” Ryan yells over the roar of the engine. Geoff nods in approval at Ryan’s suggestion and stops at a crummy gas station a few miles on. There’s no guarantee that they’ll necessarily find champagne, but cheap vodka would do too. Neither of them take off their driving gloves as they walk towards the store.

Giddy from lust and alcohol and love Ryan wraps his arms around Geoff from behind and hangs onto him as they go into the shop attached to the station. Ryan plants a kiss on Geoff’s cheek and Geoff blushes and giggles like a teenager. There aren’t many people here at this time of night.

“I’m so happy to be married to you,” says Ryan, sighing happily, “you’re loaded, so should we divorce I get half of your shit, Ramsey.”

Geoff nudges Ryan in the ribs which prompts him to laugh and also let go of Geoff. “Babe, if we got married illegally, you can bet your bottom dollar we’ll get divorced illegally too.”

 Ryan meanders over to the snack section. “You hungry?”                                                   

Geoff bits his lip and smirks at Ryan. “You bet I am,” he says his voice dropping to a low, suggestive tone.

“Oh right, I married a cock-hungry slut, I forgot.” Ryan replied, raising his eyebrow, “seriously though, are you hungry? We haven’t had our wedding breakfast yet. I was thinking maybe these delicious, apparently handmade ninety-nine cent sandwiches that expired a few hours ago?”

Geoff sidles up behind Ryan and wraps his arms around his waist and rests his head on his chin. “I’d be happy eating trash as long I was eating it with you, Ry.”

“Uh, thanks?” Ryan asks, bemused. Geoff wasn’t too good at the whole poetic-romance thing.

Muttering quietly to themselves as they discuss sandwich fillings, a somewhat intentional sounding cough breaks the low volume.

“Fucking fags.”

Geoff tried to ignore it but after the third accidentally-on purpose cough, blatantly discriminating them on grounds of their sexuality, Geoff felt his temper nearly rise to boiling point. Ryan showed no expression on his face, which made Geoff fear for that bigoted dickhead’s life. He felt Ryan tense up and let go of him. You could never tell when Ryan was angry, which is what made him so dangerous. He looked and acted perfectly calm and rational up until he pulled his gun out. Ryan was in this state now. Geoff stepped away and let Ryan control the situation.

“Excuse me, sir?” Ryan asked the old gentleman who looked like he hadn’t seen a shower for at least six years.

“All I’m sayin’ is you’re goin’ to hell, son.”

“What makes you say that?”

“God hates you faggot types. You both need God in your lives, or at least some pretty ladies. You… together, that shit ain’t normal, kid. It’s gross and weird. Lot of ya should be wiped out if you ask me.”

The man positively spat with every hard syllable and from his speech Ryan could tell he did not have a full set of teeth, or even half a set of teeth for that matter. Geoff, in this time, had managed to sneak behind the counter and disable the alarm and alert system while the cashier was out fixing a gas pump. Off went the security cameras, out with the security tapes.

“I don’t think you said that to the right person,” Ryan replied, maintaining his cool demeanour. “I don’t need pretty ladies thanks, I’m not into that. I got Geoff, my husband. We’re pretty happy, thanks. I’m pretty sure if I went to hell, it wouldn’t be for being in love with someone the same sex as me.”

“You’re just saying that cuz your brain’s all messed up. One of our kids grew up funny and we sent him off to get better and now he’s married with three kids! He’s miserable as sin but I’d prefer a sad son to a faggot son.”

“Wow, you really are a piece of shit, aren’t you?” Ryan remarked, his voice getting a little louder. Not long now, thought Geoff. He moved from the counter as the cashier walked back in and went back to pretending to be interested in the sandwiches.

“I’m trying to help you, kid! You’re a strapping young man, girl’s be chasing you, just ditch that freaking Etch-A-Sketch scum you’re entangled with and save yourself.”

“Now you’re just crossed the line, sir.”

In the blink of an eye Ryan had produced a pistol from behind him (he always kept one on him somewhere) and had shot the man directly between the eyes. This was what Geoff had been waiting for. He produced his own from a holster around his ankle, as did Ryan and so it began. Their honeymoon.

Geoff took out the cashier as Ryan went after the remaining customers, now screaming and trying to get to the exit. Ryan picked them off one by one, filling them with bullets as they tried to flee for their lives. Geoff needed to work on his aim, so he was trying to hit them from behind the counter. He was pretty good at close range. Nowhere near as good as Ryan was, but he was pretty good at melee. There was a shovel behind the counter which he picked up and joined Ryan going after those poor customers. It took one good swing to get them to the floor and a few more blows to the head to kill them. But Geoff liked to make sure. It was so satisfying to make sure. Blood everywhere, a human reduced to a pink, pulsating mess. Just like how Ryan liked to dual wield. He loved the sensation of control it gave him – some unsuspecting jerk would think that he couldn’t see him sneaking out but bang, Ryan could shoot from his periphery and God help anyone who tried to escape.

It was all over in a few minutes. It was eerily quiet apart from the blood thumping in Ryan’s ears. This was one of their interests in common. He turned to Geoff, throwing the guns aside and pulling him in. This was the best way to end a kill – kissing Geoff passionately, not starting slow, diving right in. He wanted to taste Geoff, take control of him, he killed for him and wanted him to know that. He wanted to show him the power of a man who would take lives for him and even if Geoff was older and aesthetically more intimidating, Ryan could completely dominate a situation if he wanted to.

He shoved Geoff against a shelf as he continued to kiss him, moving his mouth from Geoff’s lips to his neck, causing Geoff’s knees to go weak. Geoff desperately tried to grab at Ryan’s skin, tried to lift up his shirt but he was wearing too many layers. Goddamnit, Geoff wanted Ryan right here and now. Geoff was so fucking turned on by Ryan when he was focused on his killing, how he stood, how he held himself, the fucking smirk on his face and how he’d occasionally look over to Geoff and bite his lip.

Ryan was painfully sucking a hickey into Geoff’s neck but he fucking loved it. He knew no one was on to them but still the danger of the situation was an extra thrill for the both of them. Geoff pushed him off briefly, not wanting to pause for too long.

“There’s a back room. You, me, now. I want you naked and in me.” Geoff demanded.

“My pleasure,” Ryan panted cocking his eyebrow, almost undressing himself as they ran to the back room. Geoff locked the both of them in and took his own clothes off as Ryan peeled his top layers off one by one to reveal the flesh Geoff so desperately wanted to stroke and kiss. Ryan’s fucking arms drove Geoff crazy. They were strong and muscular, perfect for holding him through the cold nights or for fucking him up against a wall.

“You want me?” Ryan asked, his voice dark.

“Oh God, yes.”

“Get on your fucking knees.” Ryan commanded.

Geoff did as he was told as Ryan unzipped his pants and took them off along with his boxers. Geoff bit his lip at the sight before him. They’d never done this at the scene of one of their crimes before and he was loving every second of it.

Geoff knew what to do. He wrapped his lips around Ryan’s head and slowly took him in his mouth, his jaw stretching slowly open as he took as much as he physically could. Ryan placed a hand on the back of Geoff’s head and guided him as he moaned above him, low, seductive moans that sounded like they’d come straight from a porno.

“Oh Jesus, fuck…” Ryan uttered as Geoff took all of him, gagging slightly but it didn’t really bother him, his lips stretched around the base of Ryan’s cock. He hollowed his cheeks as he pulled back, running his tongue along the underside as he did it. He felt Ryan’s grip tighten in Geoff’s hair and felt his hand forcing his head down Ryan’s shaft. He hummed lightly, he knew Ryan liked the feeling when he did that, as Ryan started to be more forceful, fucking into Geoff’s mouth and Geoff was more than willing to take it. He loved being treated like this, he was Ryan’s Little Slut and and although he was now technically Ryan’s Husband, he would always revert to slut at the drop of a hat.

Ryan pulled out, running a hand through his hair.

“Stand up.”

Geoff stood up, knees weak after being pressed into the floor, but was soon pushed by Ryan back up against a wall. Ryan took Geoff’s cock in his hand and started pumping him, making Geoff moan and spill profanities from his lips, doubly so when Ryan gave Geoff’s neck attention with his lips, tongue and teeth, leaving more marks before pressing his lips against Geoff’s swollen, wet lips and biting his lower lip.

“Oh fuck, baby, I’m so close.” Geoff moaned, his voice cracking from the sensation.

Ryan stopped immediately. Geoff whimpered at the lack of contact.

“Turn around. Face the wall,” Ryan ordered.

“Yes, boss.” Geoff replied quietly, trying to contain his excitement.

He braced himself against the wall, his forearms and upper chest pressed up against the cool surface of the wall, his hips jutting out and his legs spread.

He heard a faint pop of Ryan’s fingers leaving his mouth and felt the sensation of Ryan prepping him. Sure, they could go find lube and condoms in the bloodied store but neither of them wanted to break from this heated situation. Ryan didn’t prep him for long down to impatience but Geoff was used to taking his cock by now and had done so with less than that. Although they’d slept together many times he still gasped at the feel of Ryan’s cock filling him up. Ryan placed his hands on Geoff’s hips and started thrusting into him at a fairly fast pace, but despite the lack of prep Geoff didn’t really mind and Ryan didn’t seem to mind either as both of them were groaning and muttering “oh fuck” within minutes.

Geoff was pretty sure Ryan’s grip was going to leave bruises on his hips, but he didn’t really care. It was worth it.

“You take my cock so fucking good,” Ryan said between breaths, “you’re so fucking pretty like this.”

Geoff couldn’t respond, his moaning replaced by heavy gasps for breath as he felt the pressure building up. Ryan was hitting his sweet spot over and over again with unrelenting and powerful thrusts and Geoff was really fucking close again.

“B-boss, I-I’m close,” Geoff stuttered. Through trial and error, Geoff had found that Ryan loved being called Boss in the bedroom when he was in the commanding position.

Ryan pressed his body against’ Geoff’s back and slowed his thrusting a fraction.

“Come for me, Geoff,” he moaned into Geoff’s ear before fucking Geoff hard against the wall, with more force than before. That did it for Geoff. He came, breathing Ryan’s name over and over as he came over himself and the wall in front of him. Ryan came too, the sight of Geoff coming before him being too good a sight and filled him up. They stilled after a minute or so, drawing apart as the two became cold and the butterflies in their stomachs subsided. They redressed and headed to leave the scene of the crime.

They stopped on their way out to stock up on cigarettes and alcohol, taking as much as they could carry. They got to the car and Geoff got into the drivers seat and rested his eyes (and somewhat cum-filled ass – he could potentially be sitting on it for a while) while Ryan filled the trunk with it all and went back into the place to make a second trip. A few minutes later, Ryan got into the car next to Geoff, holding a bottle of whiskey to replace the one they’d emptied before entering the store.

“Y’know, I’ve just had a thought,” Geoff said, cracking the bottle open and taking a large swig, “our DNA is gonna be everywhere in there. If the cops find it-“

Ryan pressed a finger to Geoff’s lips, smiling. “I’ve got it covered.”

He lit a cigarette with a match, which was unusual for him, and that’s when Geoff understood how Ryan had covered it. He threw the match a few feet away and when it landed a sea of fire erupted, the trail getting ever closer to the shop, but more importantly, the gas pumps.

“Drive.”

Geoff did as he was told and they sped off into the night, the explosion being a mere echo as they left the city.

“I fucking love you, Geoff.” Ryan yelled into the air, laughing and grinning.

Ryan was a scary dude but his laughter was infectious and so was his happiness. Geoff couldn’t believe he was so lucky as to have this man as his husband.

“I fucking love you too, Ryan, more than you could ever know.”

They drive off. They’ll drive for a day, maybe, before finding a cheap motel, where they’ll consummate the marriage again. And again, a


End file.
